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The family, however, is not as stable internally as it appears to be on the surface.
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The parents often lack the emotional capacity to adequately nuture one another, much less their children. As a result, both are emotionally needyand impoverished, perhaps due to the abusive upbringing of one or both parents. Over time the parents become estranged from one another, not only emotionally but also sexually. Sometimes they develop work schedules that allow themto avoid interacting with one another on much more than a superficial level.
Alcoholism or other problems are often evident and contribute to the barren emotional family climate. The mother turns to her daughter for help in runningthe household, and the father turns to his daughter for emotional and sexualsustenance. Children, then, often turn to one another to meet their own emotional or other needs, and sometimes the relationship becomes sexual. When andif incest in this family is discovered by an outsider, it is denied or treated as insignificant.
The dysfunction and its associated denial contribute to an unstable atmosphere supported by inconsistent responses on the part of the parents. What bringspraise and affection one day results in abuse and rejection on another.
Children cope with this inconsistency by learning to be mistrustful and by responding in ways that help them avoid further conflict, criticism, or punishment. In extreme cases, children begin to split off these different experiences ofreality, a process that ultimately develops a fragmented sense of self.
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Without outside intervention to break the cycle, the abuse becomes self-perpetuating. It distorts the individual personality of family members and the relationships among them. Incest is a form of chronic traumatic stress that can lead to a host of initial and long-term effects. Like child sexual abuse in general, it poses a serious mental health risk for many victims.
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The chronic nature of the abuse, thenature of the family, including its dynamics and defenses, the child's dependence on and entrapment in the family, and his or her loyalty to that family,necessitate using strong defenses to cope. Denial and dissociation splitting off of normal thought processes from consciousness allow the victim to discount, minimize, or otherwise suppress memories of abuse.
These defenses often persist into adulthood. As a result, survivors may appear asymptomatic andnot suffering from long-term effects of the abuse, when in reality they are emotionally constricted due to the trauma.
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Most former incest victims had little opportunity either in childhood or later to get effective assistance to end the abuse or to treat its effects. Theseuntreated effects immediate or long-term become chronic or delayed and give rise to additional symptoms. These symptoms, in turn, create new problems that usually prompt the adult survivor to seek treatment.
Some of the most common of these problems include depression, eating disorders, substance abuse,anxiety, or dissociative disorders such as multiple personality disorder. Survivors might also seek treatment for domestic abuse or other types of sexualviolence.
Since incest usually occurs in childhood, it inevitably influences maturationand development. For many survivors, the incest experience, along with its aftermath and coping mechanisms, has greatly influenced and become integratedinto the personality.
Some survivors develop the symptoms of specific personality disorders, most commonly those associated with hysteric, borderline difficulty maintaining a stable mood and self-imagenarcissistic, avoidant, ordependent personalities.
Long-term treatment is often required because of the frequency and severity of the abuse, its impact on the developmental process, and the character of the victim.
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Time is also needed to work with strong defenses and establish a therapeutic alliance of trust. Those survivors who have suffered the most serious repercussions and who present the most serious symptoms, including multiple personality, other dissociative states, substance dependencies or addictions of any type, and suicidal and self-destructive behavior, the therapist canassume that the therapy is going to take years.
Optimally, the therapist-survivor relationship develops slowly, the interventions and interpretations paced according to both the survivor's ability to work with them and the degree of affect and defense they generate. Often the survivor becomes discouraged or enraged by the need for such lengthy treatment, its slow pace, and the disequilibrium inherent in recovering from the effects of incest. Some survivors even view therapy as prolonging the abuse.
It is important for the therapist to support the outrage, resentment, and discouragement, however. Explanations of the course of therapy and the reasons for its likely duration can put the process in perspective and offer thesurvivor support and reassurance. Regardless of what type of treatment approach is chosen, common goals include: acknowledgement and acceptance of the occurrence of the incest recounting the incest breakdown of feelings of isolation and stigma recognition, labeling, and expression of feelings resolution of responsibility and survival issues grieving cognitive restructuring of distorted beliefs and stress responses self-determination and behavioral change education and skill-building.
The basic goal of therapy is to help the survivor, in a safe and controlled way, recall the abuse and the original feelings associated with it and to restore the accurate meanings attached to the abuse. The turning point for the patient occurs when his or her rage is experienced not in a vacuum but as a response to cruelty.
The patient needs to understand that nothing will erase thepast. The work of therapy is, rather, to reclaim that traumatic past as partof his or her history and identity. With this kind of understanding, the abused patient will be able to grieve and to let go of both the trauma and the distortions in memory and mood that were once necessary for survival.
Powered by JRank. org Health Human bite infections to International Red Cross. User Contributions: 1. sally mitchell. Her fiance' recently brought it to my attention that she has confided in him about an incestuous relationship she had with her brother who is 1 yr older than her for 3yrs during their pre-teen ages.
I have always felt there is something wrong but couldnt put my finger on it. My daughter has experienced alot of emotional "mood swings" over the years. My son has developed a tendancy towards violent outbursts.
Theres an obvious love-hate relationship between them.
He has intentionally dated all of her female friends since Jr High school. She doesnt even bother making female friends anymore because he will take them. Until now I just thought he was just going out with whoever he saw walk through the door but now I believe its a control issue and a punishment issue. Thats about the same time I noticed the changes in behavior in both of them.
At this point they do not know I know. I know they both need major therapy. Im worried about her going through therapy while pregnant. The stress may cause her to miscarry. Any suggestions on how to approach the situation?
Sally, I just came across this today september 6. I am a vicitm not a professional but I have had very good help in recovery. I encourage you to look for and consult a therapist who is an expert in sexual trauma. If not, Louisiana has a trauma unit at River Oaks hospital in River Ridge. There are others like it around the country. I STRONGLY recommend you consult someone and go from there.
I'm doing an article on incest in the USA, do you know where I can get the latest statistics and data on incest? I'm not going to go into the particulars but my oldest sister whom was married began having a physical sexual extramarital affair with me when I was in my mid-twenties, she in her early thirties. It was my idea, we crossed that forbidden line into incest and have no regrets about it. At the time it wasn't long after she had given birth to their second child and she had her tubes tied because they agreed not to have any more children and she didn't want to get pregnant again.
Having her tubes tied allows us to have intercourse naturally with internal ejaculation which we both prefer.
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She was in her early forties when her husband asked her for a divorce because he found a woman that he loved more, so she gave him a divorce.
Needing a place to live for at least awhile and me being single, never married, no children, and having a large three bedroom house she moved in with me and has a bedroom of her own to display to make it look on the up and up but in reality behind closed doors she and I are a loving couple and when the lights go out she's in bed with me as my lover, as my mate.
I'm 61 years-old now and in a couple of weeks she turns 65 years-old. Our incestuous relationship did not begin until we were adults, there was no coercion, and we are very comfortable with it. To us its perfectly natural, we love each other, and are in love with each other although discretely and in private. Our only regret is that we can't openly display love and affection because we are brother and sister and incest is still illegal. My dad was diagnosed with Parkinson's disease.
his symptoms were shuffling of feet,slurred speech, low volume speech, degradation of hand writing, horrible driving skills, right arm held at 47 degree angle, but now he finally free from the disease with the help of total cure from ULTIMATE LIFE CLINIC, he now walks properly and all symptoms has reversed, he had trouble with balance especially at night, getting into the shower and exiting it is difficult,getting into bed is also another thing he finds impossible.
we had to find a better solution for his condition which has really helped him a lot,the biggest helped we had was ultimate life clinic they walked us through the proper steps,am highly recommended this ultimatelifeclinic.
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Send comment. Disclaimer The Content is not intended as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition.
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